I'm not sure if it happens to others as much it happens to me but (for some strange reason) I feel disappointed when things that I don't really want become inaccessible to me. At this stage the future looks secure but a bit vague. The ultimate question of what I want to do with my life has started knocking again on the door to my mind- only this time with double intensity. At times I run for cover while on other occasions I just accept disappointments as a part of my destiny. As it is I was morose on account of my best friend being down with fever- the news of non-inclusion on a list that I believe looks incomplete without my name on it struck me really hard ... much harder than I expected. Though I really would not have wanted the end-result of the inclusion (the lack of which makes me sad now); there is an aura of a huge loss around this event. Perhaps after a couple of months I would realise the overall significance of this disappointment but till then my self-confidence would be badly in need of some boost.
