दहेज़-ह्त्या: अग्नि से प्रश्न- एक लघु-कविता

त्राहि-त्राहि करती रही वह दानवों के मध्य में; क्यों न तुम उन दानवों के अंत की वाहक बनी?
उस निर्दोष बालिका के शरीर को झुलसाते हुए; तुम पसीज कर क्यों नहीं जल की बूँदें बनी?
सोचकर वह द्रश्य रोम-रोम काँप उठता है- तुम क्यों ना कांपी और कैसे प्रज्वलित रही?
मानव-जन्य तो नहीं हो तुम- तुम तो देवांश हो- पर यह कैसा ईश्वरत्व कि निर्बल की हन्ता बनी?

Life

My life has changed - some say, for good. In fact existence would be a more appropriate word to describe my state. 'Life' as I knew ended the day I began my 'professional life'. All that's left of life now, is bare existence - I wake up, I complete daily chores, I go to office, I come back to my house (cage), I watch T.V., I read newspaper/books, I go to bed and I wake up. This rather monotonous cycle captures my life- my existence. To be continued ...

Home

I am heading for home day after tomorrow. The period of 5 years passed by so quickly that, at times I feel I stepped into the premises of NLS (soon to be my alma mater) only a couple of weeks back. The grief of leaving an entire gamut of things, places and people associated with law school- friends, teachers, hostel et.al.; far outweighs the prospect of happiness that I hope to derive from spending time in the city I hail from and with my family. When I force (only because my mind is weary with grief) myself to think about aspects of my life at law school that I will miss the most; those idle conversations with friends- in room, on hostel rooftop, in class, in Nagarbhavi ... stand out- it is amazing to think how those desultory (often nonsensical) conversations played a major part in developing and nurturing a bond so strong. Before I end this post, I must acknowledge the role of my best friend in making my stay in Bangalore a pleasant experience- often, at great discomfort to herself. Although a number of not so pleasant accounts of my prospective workplace and about professional life in general have been conveyed to me; being an incorrigible optimist that I am; I hope my experience in professional life makes me say ... It was all worth it!!

लक्ष्य

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निर्धारित-लक्ष्य को भेदकर भी मन में क्यों उल्लास नहीं!

अनिश्चितता के दुर्ग की देहरी पर पहुंचकर भी क्यों;
विजय -पताका फहराने की मन में कोई आस नहीं!

मीलों प्यासे चलने पर जब कूप दिखाई दिया है;
तो भी पथिक-मन डोरी खींचने भर करता क्यों प्रयास नहीं !

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Tears

I have always been thankful to you and even the most drastic change in circumstances or your opinion about me will not effect this feeling. At mos times you fill my life with joy for which I don't have words to express my gratitude. So why should I complain about the tears that your bring to my eyes - I won't wipe them but let them trickle down to my heart for I am indeed thankful to you for these tears as well. Thank you!

Trust

Many days have passed since we resolved to begin a journey together. A journey which we agreed to embark upon telling each other we'll always trust each other- no matter what happens. That resolve was weakened by my mistakes and it was very late when I realised disclosure without hesitating for a moment was the key to earning one's trust and I did that. Even if I was embarrassed to share certain things with you I disclosed those to you - not fearing that I might lose you, not hesitating at all. But something happened in the interim- perhaps my realisation happened very late or perhaps I had done irredeemable damage by then. I am not sure- what I am sure of is the fact that I ever since the realisation dawned upon me, I have been honest with you - like I have been with no one else, perhaps not even to myself. In spite of this when I find that what I have gained in terms of your trust is a pittance I feel truly and terribly hurt. I just want to escape from this harsh reality and go hide myself somewhere. I don't know what to do or whom to go to.

For my best friend

Dear Friend,

This is to wish you a very happy Valentine's day. I know the feelings that we share for each other do not require the pretext of any such 'day' for our love gets fresher and stronger with each passing day nevertheless, I am choosing this occasion to let you know that you're invaluable for me. This minute when you are on board a mode of transport headed for your home I am thinking of you and the moments we spent together. I am realising how distance brings people together- by allowing them to collate and crystallise all those figments of their memory they want to cherish. Take care my friend and have a nice and fulfilling stay at your home. Wish you all the best!

Yours,

N.B.